This mom has a screaming 9-month-old baby that is so loud that other parents have started to comment on it.
Why would a 9-month-old baby be screaming often and loudly? We go through three important age-appropriate reasons to consider.
Mom’s Question:
My son is nine months old and spends much of his time screaming; sometimes, this is accompanied by crying, but not always. When I say screaming, I mean it’s really, really loud.
Other mothers have started commenting that they have never heard a baby so loud or who screams so frequently. The screaming has been going on for weeks. When he screams, he never has a temperature, I offer food and drink, and he wants neither, nor does his nappy need changing. It is just short bursts of deafening screaming and can continue on and off for hours.
It mainly seems to start if I put him in his stroller, cot, bed, highchair, or sometimes the floor, or sometimes when I talk to someone else, but sometimes even when I am with him or carrying him or giving him sole attention, he screams too.
He had a recent checkup and had no earache, sore throat, or urinary infection. He has just cut his third and fourth teeth, so I don’t think it’s teething. I am really worried there is something wrong, and I know people think that too.
Easy Baby Life:
Tips For Screaming 9-Month-Old Baby
When reading your post, I thought of a few possible reasons for his screaming.
1. Screaming due to pain
One possible reason is pain. It is very good that you have had him checked up since understanding if a baby is in pain and why can be difficult.
One possible source of pain that you didn’t mention is tummy pain. Could you have introduced some new foods that his belly can’t tolerate? That’s at least something to consider.
2. Screaming because he is scared
Another option, especially at his age, is that your son is scared. At his age, his mind is developing, and he realizes that he is his own person, separate from his mom. For many babies, that is terrifying.
One of my children, my daughter, reacted similarly to your son. That she has a strong voice didn’t help. She screamed so loud out of the blue (in my view) when we met some people or even at some voices that I thought something really hurt her. (At four years old, she had a lovely singing voice, which wasn’t bad.)
9 months old really is at the peak of both separation anxiety and stranger anxiety for many children. (You can read about 9-month development and milestones here. )
They need very badly to be reassured that mom continues to be around, despite her actually having her own body, separate from theirs. It may sound like a joke, but for the children, this really is a trauma. Being put down, put in a crib, or just left alone for a few minutes can be more than they can take.
Studies have shown that babies that are allowed to really be held and carried and have their needs for comfort met at this time actually grow out of their anxiety faster. So even if it is tough – and it is! – don’t be hard on your son.
Don’t use any cry-it-out methods, and don’t worry that he isn’t normal. He can probably sense that from you too, which doesn’t help as it makes him even more uncertain. Instead, carry your little screamer around, hug him, kiss him, and tell him that you love him over and over again. And when he does show small signs of independence, encourage him with a big smile.
3. Screaming for attention
If your son isn’t scared, it can be so that you have unintentionally reinforced his screaming. As parents, it is so easy to grab a moment of peace whenever our children are happy and not looking for our attention, so we unconsciously reinforce more demanding behaviors by simply mainly attending to our children when there is something to correct.
Your son may have learned that he will get a lot of attention from you by screaming. To counter that learned behavior, make sure you give him lots of attention in a positive way when he is happy and calm. Play games, make him laugh, sing and let him “help out” by being around where you are.
Also, don’t make a big fuss about his screaming. Don’t try to shut him up; try to distract him instead. Make sure he is comfortable, not scared, and with you, and do not react strongly to his screaming. Give him something interesting to look at or play with together with you instead.
At 9 months, a baby can learn to imitate your movements if you do Itsy Bitsy Spider or some other song. They can even learn sign language. So there is a lot of fun to try out together.
You can also play games to start teaching your baby to talk!
And on what other people say…
Finally, don’t bother with what other people say! Having a strong voice is a good thing that will help him later in life. Whether he is scared, frustrated, or simply looking for attention, or even just trying his voice, it is all still a phase that will pass. It is great to try to figure out what triggers the screaming and then act to mitigate this.
I hope some of the thoughts above will help you find some ways to improve the situation. Be on the lookout for screaming that can be related to pain. But otherwise, just be with him, cuddle, have fun, distract him and enjoy him as much as you can!
He is simply growing up. And that can be tough, as we all know :-)
Take care, and don’t worry,
Paula
More Crying Babies
- 10-Month-Old Never Stops Crying
- 10 Months Baby Wants To Be Carried All The Time
- 11-Month-Old Cries Most Of The Day
Can you relate? Do you have a screaming 9-month-old baby? Or do you have any tips that worked for you in this situation? Please share below!
You can also find many more o Crying Baby articles here.
Paula Dennholt founded Easy Baby Life in 2006 and has been a passionate parenting and pregnancy writer since then. Her parenting approach and writing are based on studies in cognitive-behavioral models and therapy for children and her experience as a mother and stepmother. Life as a parent has convinced her of how crucial it is to put relationships before rules. She strongly believes in positive parenting and a science-based approach.
Paula cooperates with a team of pediatricians who assist in reviewing and writing articles.
I’m not sure that my 9 month old is having just separation anxiety. She whines when I’m there and not specifically paying attention to her. She screams when I leave the room. I can keep her occupied with a toy for about 2 minutes or less, and then she’s back to whining non-stop. She IS teething, but this is excessive.
And for whatever reason, my baby doesn’t use teethers. She’ll play with them with her hands, but she won’t put it in her mouth, no matter the amount of coaxing. I’m just at a loss because the only time she’s not whining or screaming lately is when she’s sleeping.
My son is 9 months and will scream when I leave him with his grandmother or older brothers just so I can run errands or take showers, having conversation with others, or even using the restroom. When I get home from running errands he’s screaming so much when I get home that it’s worrying me. It’s bad enough that they are so tired from watching him or not wanting to help me when I need it.
Hi Leia, from what you describe, your son has separation anxiety when he is away from you. This is completely normal at his age and actually a positive sign that he has bonded well with you. This stage WILL pass, and in my view, trying to force it will mainly create stress. My suggestion is that you try to leave your son as little as possible right now. Let him come a long to the shower, rest room, errands when possible. Get yourself a carrier and just let him come along. Then practice very short separations and really try to remain calm as positive when you leave. You can also play peek-a-boo and similar games to help him slowly learn that you have not disappeard for good when he can’t see you.
I do understand that it is stressful for his grandmother if he cries a lot when you are away. Try to find ways they can take care of him that are as positive as possible – maybe he will be happier if you leave for a short while during a stroller walk? Also, explain to them how separation anxiety works and that his reactions are completely normal.
I hop this helps!
My son (9month old) Raury screams and cries and wails all day long from the time he wakes (4:30 am) to 7pm when he goes down for bed.
He very rarely wants to sleep though he gets exhausted, and when he does go down for a nap its usually very short. Sometimes I just know he is tired and put him down and he will cry relentlessly for an hour. :-(
He is also a wiggle worm and does not seem to like being held cuddled or wrapped up tightly in a blanket, this has made feeding time very difficult I had to quit nursing & switch to formula at 1 month old because I could not get him to be stil and eat, so my milk dried up. Because the only way he will eat is by laying down in his crib with a bottle( because there are no distractions) he has learned to only go to sleep with a bottle. I’m afraid this could lead to bottle rot. :-(
He is also not sleeping through the night yet he still wakes up 2 – 3 times a night and acts like he is starving….I have tried feeding him more fatty foods before bed like yogurt and meat or potatoes, pasta ect….I’ve tried only giving bottles of water when he wakes up at night nothing is working with this one Im soooooooo tired and frustrated. What can I do?
Try the chiropractor. That was a miracle for my son. They worked in his mouth and gently aligned things that were out of alignment. He was so peaceful and calm after our visits. I couldn’t believe it was the same child!!!!
Almost word for word what I’m experiencing now. Any chance you can tell me how things turned out with Raury? If you found anything that helped?
I think she just likes the sound of her voice. She will crawl up to me and just start screaming. its really nerve wracking! i cant figure out anything that explains to her that screaming is bad.
I am having the exact same problem. My son screams for no particular reason. I think that he is too young to understand “No” or “Shhh”. It helps when I feed him, but he will still randomly scream. You are not alone!
you am not alone i am a mommy of three and my third one all he does his scream high pitch for no reason dont matter if he is playing or being hold, but he is a poorly baby has been since birth so just put it down to that
Recently, my son has started screaming to get attention. He is not hungry, his diaper is clean, and I am within his sight. He simply thinks I need to be holding him 24/7. When he has started to have a screaming fit I simply take him to his crib, give him a kiss and tell him I will be back when he stops crying. When he would stop crying I would go back in and pick him up, give him and kiss and hug and tell him I love him. If he started crying again later I would repeat the cycle. He has begun to understand that crying for attention when I am in the same room and not necessarily ignoring him is not allowed. I hardly could do this anymore and it only took about a week for him to get the idea. Now he simply crawls to where I am or plays while I am working on something else.